May the change be with you

“It’s only after you’ve stepped outside your comfort zone that you begin to change, grow, and transform.” 

― Roy T. Bennett

When I started this year I knew this would be a year of major change after all it was part of the reason why I wanted this blog to happen. I knew I was going to change in ways that would leave me both physically and mentally unrecognisable. All in a good way of course. This would be a year where I would be put to the test. I would either fall or grow to unimaginable heights.

The month of May has been the turning point month. The month of great change. The month that starting my make or break journey. Regardless of where things go from here I am proud of myself for the way I handled things. Sticking with my philosophy of staying positve and shaping my own life with my thoughts and actions.

Photo by Ross Findon from Unsplash

When the calender slipped onto May 1st, I took a deep breath to prepare myself. It was the first day of a month long filming event that I had been preparing for as well as a turbulent month for my personal life. But like every day I left work thinking about all the things I wish I was doing with my life. I went home that afternoon daydreaming about what it would be like to be driving home from my dream job to my dream home in my dream car. Beside me in my bag was my manifestation journal. A book I had all the things I wanted from life.

Only a few days previous, I had wrote my clarity page on what I wanted by the end of 2019. Number 1 was a new job with a bright, friednly atmosphere where I would make more and work wtih fun, active people. How little did I know how soon this would be coming true.

A few days previously my dad had moved in with us. Due to tough times in the Alberta Economy he had come to work in Strathmore for a little while. I tried to pep talk him into seeing this as a postive experience, a break from tireless work in a stuffy office.

“We have to think positively dad. They way you think shapes your world!” I said to him over our first vegatarian meal.

He nodded and thanked me for the delicious food. This had been one of my changes that came about this month. Going plant based was something I had been wanting to do for a longtime as it srongly aligned with personal values. It was just the beginning of the crazy way my life has changed for the better.

“What a crazy start to a the month hey?” I laughed thinking about going plant-based and the new living arrangements.

“But a great start. I feel it, this is gonna be a good month.” My boyfriend happily declared too busy talking to try the meal. But his sentiment stuck with me because I had this feeling in my bones that this month was going to be important in my self-change journey.

Then came the hard hitter of the month.

On May 6th, due to budget cuts I was laid off.

One thousand thoughts went through my head. What would I do now? How could we survive off one paycheck? Why me?

“But this may be the time to start something of your own, to keep growing.” my superintendent kindly said.

The light bulb went off in my head. Had Lisa and I not discussed starting something of our only the week before? Had I not been wanting to start my own business since second year of university? Had I not always thought that my future lay in been a business owner?

Within days Lisa and I had officially decided to give it a go and our company was born. A process I will leave for another post. For it is one of the most profound moments of my life.

Positivity is power

Had this happened to me a year ago it would have crushed me. The idea of been laid off would have ruined any confidence and growth that I had very slowly gained. This time last year, I was not in a good place. I let life happen to me and my mood showed it. I wanted to be happy but all I could see was how everyone else seemed to be growing, becoming successful and yet I felt like I was going nowhere.

One year later the news, rather than sending me spirally into a depressive episode, I saw it as a positive thing. It was the metaphorical kick in the butt I needed to get my life on track.

For you see despite feeling like I needed to be more, I was to comfortable in my position. And comfort if the killer of success.

I will start a business one day I would tell myself, everyday. I will go plant-based and be more sustainable one day. I will live more intuitivly one day. But that was one day, it required hard work and a leap I wasn’t ready to make when I didn’t need to. I wanted these things with my entire heart and soul but I was holding myself back.

Then the universe took it all away and I am so thankful for that. And for someone who lives by the ideals of Law of Attraction this was just way to show that I was on the right track.

So the time I closed the book on May I let out a breath. In the span of one month, 31 days. I had been laid off and started my own business, had my dad move in then out, I followed my dreams and found myself been a more positive person.

Let’s hope June is just as good for my growth, though I could probably do without anymore life-changing suprises!